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Do you need to change the story you are telling?

I am going as a Super Hero for Halloween this year. Not because I feel I actually am, but because I need to change the story I am telling, for my own survival.


Pandemic parenting. Pandemic working. Pandemic side hustling. Pandemic friend. Pandemic daughter and granddaughter. Put it all together and I'm not sure true “balance” is realistic. Whatever roles you may be cast into at this moment, life has changed as we know it. And it’s not going away. We live in a world that moves faster and faster and expects more than ever before, and it’s just going to continue at warp speed. Unless we can create our own boundaries and ask for what we need.




Ways that may look:


Work-

“I really have a full plate at the moment. Can we revisit at a later time so I can focus on Project X?”


“Can we talk about some flexible work arrangements? I have some things at home that need my attention and I want to make this work.”


“I know we are short staffed. Can we visit the possibility of bringing on an intern to help?”


Partner-

“Do you mind if I head out for a couple of hours today, while you stay home with the kids? I could really use a little me- time to clear my head.”


“Do you have some time to cook dinner another night this week, or throw in another load of laundry? I would so appreciate it.”


If finances allow: “Let’s outsource help. Can we talk about re-balancing our budget to bring on a help for lawn maintenance or housecleaning so we can have more quality family time?”






Child-

“I had a really busy day at work today. I just need a bit to rest. How about you play by yourself or with your sister for a while and then I will join in?”


When you lose control- “I’m sorry I snapped at you earlier. I just have a lot on my mind and lost my patience. I will do better. I promise”


And the most important of all- S E L F-

“I’m going to do a 20- minute mediation video after my kids go to bed tonight”


“I’m going to take that lunchbreak I’m entitled to and go for a 20 minute walk.”




We need to normalize making adjustments in our lives to maintain and improve our mental health. Oftentimes it starts with a minor behavior change or simply starting a conversation. What do you have to lose? If you don’t move the needle, you are just going to stay right where you are.


Take care of you. The world needs you. And you will be a better parent, worker, friend if you take care of you first.


Now ask yourself what story you are currently telling yourself and others. For me at times it’s, “The world keeper going faster and faster and I can’t keep up. My work is demanding. My kids are demanding. I’m exhausted and can’t do this anymore.”


Ask yourself what new story you want to tell. Usually your situation is teaching you something. What is it teaching you? Maybe it’s, “The world is testing me right now and giving me the chance to dig deep, be strong, and take care of myself first, so I realize the true superhero I am, and show up as my best self to those around me!”




And guess what. We believe the words we tell ourselves. That is how the brain works. What mantra do you need today? Maybe it’s something like “I am calm. I am safe. I am grounded”. Fill in the blank with what you need in the moment, and then repeat it into your mind until it comes true.


Action: What one small habit or conversation can you create today, so you can show up to the world as your best self and live your purpose- the true superhero you really are? What is your mantra?







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